The Hurts that Bullies Do

Bullies are cruel people: even though the bully is being cruel because he is really hurting inside: he’s secretly afraid that no one could ever love him, or that he’ll never be good enough for anyone to think he is special. He may say, “Oh, I’m the best!” or, “Everybody else around here is a jerk!” but what he’s really saying is: “I don’t feel happy about myself. I don’t feel good about myself, I hate it that you feel good about yourself when I can’t: It’s not fair! It’s not fair when everyone else is so good. The only way I can every be good is to bring everyone else down here, down where I am feeling bad and stupid and I know no one could ever love me.

That is the bully’s greatest mistake: to bring other people down where he is, thinking that it might make him feel better. It usually doesn’t make him feel better at all but if he sees someone weaker than he is, he can always tell himself that he is all right: there’s someone worse than he is! And if someone is worse than he is, then that means he can keep away from being humiliated.

Bullies are dangerous: they have been bullied! If they have been bullied they don’t know any other way of working through things: everything turns out into hitting and hating and using force, or making other people smaller and more hurt than they are: they don’t know any other way! IN fact, a great many bullies think that the kinds of things they really need to feel better: love and friendship, caring and doing right to another person, is silly and stupid: no one can believe in that stuff!

Because bullies don’t believe love is real; because bullies know they will never get love, they make love itself bad. When they do that, they turn everyone else into a bully, too.

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