Monthly Archives: July 2016

Feeling Sad, and Three Strange Things

When something changes, you can feel very sad. If someone goes away, you can miss them; when something breaks or is lost, you can feel very disappointed. When all the things you used to know and like get changed or you can’t have them any more, that can make you very sad indeed. Doing too much without resting can also make you feel sad as well, because your body is feeling strained and disappointed too. You can even feel sad because other people around you are feeling sad!

But there are three strange things you can do to make yourself feel better. One is to smile, even though you have nothing to smile about. Even just a little smile will tell your brain to stop looking at the things that make you unhappy, such as what you have lost, and remember the things that still do make you happy, like being able to see, every day, any time you want to see, or hear, every day because you do not live in a world of blind darkness or deaf silence. These things are huge!

The second strange thing to do is to take ten deep, slow breaths. Your body will automatically relax, and when it relaxes it feel happier, and will help you to be happy.

The third strange thing you can do is tip your head back and look at the sky. You know that even when the sun is shining and the sky is blue, the stars, planets and galaxies are still out there, don’t you? All those places so far away: there are so many of them, and they are so beautiful. When you are sad, your happiness can’t be seen, but it’s still there. And then think: in all the galaxies, in all the vast number of stars, there is only one you, completely unique. There is only one! And don’t you know that the most unique things are the most valuable? It’s really true!

Kindness

Whenever you have a chance, be kind to others. Be kind by thinking how they feel about something. How does what you do look to them? How do their own lives look to them? What might they love, and what scares them? Kindness means that you understand that whatever is important to someone truly is important to him, even though you might not understand why they would, or could, care about that thing. Kindness means to hold someone gently. You don’t use them for what you need, like yelling at them because you are feeling hurt and angry, instead of working with your hurt or rage. Kindness also means that you don’t demand that they be there when you want them, even if you want them all the time, and then just forget them when you don’t want something from them. Using someone for what you need is unkind. Asking someone for a favor is certainly acceptable, but hating them or trashing them if they can’t deliver on that favor is very unkind.

So being kind to others means taking care of yourself, making sure your feelings  are only where they need to be, and taking care of others by understanding them.

Adding hate to hate

¬†Hate seems simple: you don’t like the thing or person so much you can’t stand to be with them or have them around. You even dislike them so much you want to hurt them. You find reasons to make your hate okay: they’re bad people, or they hurt you or someone you know, or maybe you’ve been told you must hate them because everyone else does. It seems so easy to hate, because hate seems so simple!

But hate is not simple. Hate is very difficult. Sometimes you say you hate someone or something because you really are afraid of them, or about something you have to do. You hate math because it’s difficult and you’re afraid of failing at it. You hate people who are different because you don’t want to look like a fool trying to talk to them and not knowing how, or saying something stupid because you don’t know.

Sometimes you say you hate someone only because you are totally frustrated about something that is happening in your life, and you think they are the cause. But actually most times you have to look into yourself to find the real cause of why your life isn’t working! Sometimes you hate someone because you feel they have hurt you, or have been mean to you, and you are afraid, or embarrassed by your feelings, especially if you are helpless to make them stop, or to make them change. Sometimes hate Is made okay for reasons that are believed again, and again, and again, until you can’t think otherwise.

So hate is not simple! But there is always one thing true about hate: adding more hate just adds more hate. It never solves anything, fixes anything, or makes anything right. You need to understand why you hate someone or something, and then fix THAT problem, instead of hurting someone or something into something or someone you think you hate.

Dreams and imagination

Everything that you use, everything that has been made by someone, was once someone’s dream or in his imagination. And there have been many plays, poems, stories was well as inventive and scientific discoveries that have been created or shown in dreams. Dreams, even day-dreams, seem a part of another world, and imagination certainly is the world of the possible, the impossible, and shows the ways to bridge the two together to create something that has never been.

So anything that keeps you from dreaming and imagining makes you and the world both poorer. If you don’t sleep enough because you are staying up absurdly late playing a computer game, you cannot have time to dream, and both your mind and body suffer. This happens a little at a time, and perhaps you don’t notice, but the same way enough little pebbles will fill the Grand Canyon, you may wake up one day to find that you cannot reach forward into the future with courage anymore. You may find that you are letting other people do your thinking for you: it will be the other people who have the ideas, and other people will tell you how to be.

It is fun, interesting, sometimes exciting and sometimes restful to watch movies, or play games, or let someone or something else “drive” you life, so much so that you may never notice that you’re not living your life anymore. You are who you are; your contribution to the world is your contribution, and no one else can be who you are, or contribute what you have inside of you. But if you never listen to your inside mind, the mind of dreams and imagination you will never succeed in being who you are, and you will not contribute what you came here to do. Treasure your imagination! Protect your dreams!